row2k Features
Exam Tips for Rowers
January 1, 1999
Stephen Arthur-Wong

For those rowers out there who are now entrenched in the halls of academia after spending most of the semester rowing their brains out here's a quick list of ways that crew can provide a more pleasant and successful final exam experience:

  1. in class, position your coach over your shoulder to correct any mistakes
  2. tell your professor you only got through one paragraph of your final paper and then you caught a crab
  3. everytime you get stuck on a hard problem, sit upright and yell: "in two, i'm taking a ten to send harvard away"
  4. bring a water bottle with you (which in a pinch can serve another purpose in case your professor doesn't allow bathroom breaks)
  5. have a coxswain there to let you know how you're doing compared to everyone else. ex: "she just broke her pencil, here's where you make your move!"
  6. bring a pitch meter, clams, and a 7/16's wrench with you in the exam. the pitch meter to arrange your desk for optimal angle, the clams for your pencil so as the questions increase in difficulty you can "lighten the load", and the 7/16 for . . . well it's just a good idea no matter where you go
  7. if you need some more time to cram before the exam, just raise your hand to let your professor know that you are not aligned
  8. explain to the dean that it's not cheating to let your bowman with the 4.0 take the test for you since he/she is just an extension of you
  9. after the test, raise your hand and protest that ohio state came over into your lane
  10. treat the exam like a 2000: do only 3/4 of the first question, 1/2 of the second, and 3/4 of the third and fourth. then, settle down to your regular pace until the last 5 questions which you do in 1:20.
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